Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
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