This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
