I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
