I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
His nipple licking is glorious
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