And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize