Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
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