so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
