So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
