I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
