I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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