I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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