the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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