We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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