Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
don't judge my taste in strippers
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
