Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize
