just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
