I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize