we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
