lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Randomize
