you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
