It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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