Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize
