In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
