Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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