all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
