fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
