Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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