She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
