it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
