she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize