Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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