real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
The air was thick with penises
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Randomize
