my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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