dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
