so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
do herpes really smell.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Randomize
