thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
