the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Randomize
