Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Randomize