I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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