I'm so fucking centered right now
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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