It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
