Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
