come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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