Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
