I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
