My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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