why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Why can't burritos get me drunk
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Randomize
