just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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