She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Randomize
