let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
